June 2012
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bookh8r replied to your post: Last month my garbage disposal was on the fritz.
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Last month my garbage disposal was on the fritz.
When they came to repair it, they found a plastic measuring spoon stuck in the drain, which had probably killed the motor. My bad, right? It fell in and I didn’t notice. Talking to my landlord just now about something else, he implied that I had put it in there myself. Because I must not know what a garbage disposal is.
“You know, it costs a lot of money to repair those things....
May 2012
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To say I didn’t get their themes — love, sex, drugs, and women — would be an...
– Elisabeth Donnelly on discovering The Afghan Whigs at 12, in an in-progress essay for It’s Complicated #1 (via itscomplicatedproject)
Yes, the whole essay is this wonderful, and I can’t wait until Niina and I aren’t the only ones who get to read it.
(via judyxberman) I wrote about The Afghan Whigs...
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221B Feelings Boulevard: Zombie apocalypse coming... →
missworded:
ihopericksantorum:
5/16: McArthur High School HazMat Situation Students, Teachers Decontaminated After Breaking Out In Rash 5/19: No confirmation on chemical at Fort Lauderdale International Airport 5/21: Police: Man bites woman in Westchester 5/23: I-285…
Does Stand Your Ground hold up in regards to zombies?
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After the poetry reading when someone suggests...
whatshouldwecallpoets:
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Spell your tumblr name with your tags.
CATS AND DOLPHINS I don’t have time for that shit The Times did say that bisexuals are real now so i guess this is a good plan Yes good shut up SUBVERSIVE!!!! Little orphan sluggies Eating my feelings since 1982! EAT THAT THING OUT Poogi?
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absurdical: nicole nicole i just wanna kick the shit out of chris evans me: we all do
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Adult Swim Puts Animated ‘Harold & Kumar’ Series... →
popculturebrain:
Including …
Freestyle Love Supreme – These I.T. guys work on their freestyle rapping at the office, much to the annoyance of their co-workers. From Ars Nova (Black Dynamite, In the Heights). (30-minute live-action)
Rick & Morty – A genius inventor grandfather and his less than genius grandson, and the journeys in life they share. From Dan Harmon (Community) and Justin...
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True addendum to a true story.
me: jfc my dad called me and i told him i maybe fractured my finger
and he went, "well, let me distract you" and then started talking about himself
absurdical: HAHAHAHA
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This is a true story.
me: I JUST SAW A GIANT ROACH IN THE KITCHEN WHAT DO I DO
absurdical: KILL IT
FIND IT KILL IT
SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE
me: WANTED TO BUT IT RAN AWAY AND NOW I CAN'T FIND IT
IT'S GOING TO EAT ME
absurdical: FIND IT
KILL IT
KILL THE SHIT OUT OF IT
SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE
IT CAN'T EAT YOU SO YOU HAVE TO MURDER IT
me: IF I DO IT'LL COME OUT AND RUN AT ME
absurdical: GOOD
me: NOOO
absurdical: MEET IT ON THE FIELD OF BATTLE
SLAY YOUR FOE
YOU HAVE TO KILL IT
BEFORE IT GETS ANY IDEAS ABOUT BREEDING
ONCE MORE UNTO THE BREECH, NICOLE, ONCE MORE!
me: COME HERE AND KILL IT FOR ME
absurdical: OR CLOSE UP THE WALL WITH YOUR ROACH-RIDDEN BODY
AW HELL NO
GO GET YOUR SPRAY AND KILL IT
ANY POISON WILL DO
me: maybe i should go get the landlord's son
absurdical: NO WAY
me: though he might judge me
absurdical: THIS IS NOT IN YOUR LEASE
YOU KILL IT
me: IT WAS ENORMOUS
absurdical: put on your boots
PUT ON YOUR BOOTS
me: ...I killed it
absurdical: did you?
me: Now what do I do
how do words
absurdical: throw it out, spray poison all along the walls and crevices where somehthing could come in
me: People are probably going to come up here because I screamed the whole time
absurdical: hahahahahaha
BUT YOU DID IT
me: "NO NO STOP LIVING STOP IT NO"
absurdical: YAY YOU KILLED IT
me: I'm all flustered
absurdical: but you did it you killed it!!!
me: I'M GONNA CRY
how do I dispose of it
it's so big and scary even though it's dead
absurdical: broom?
me: then i have to look at it
absurdical: and dustpan?
make sure it's really dead because sometimes they FAKE
so spray it
me: WHY AM I SO AFRAID
absurdical: I KNOW IT'S HARD BUT YOU JUST HAVE TO
OR IT'LL BE THERE FOREVER
me: IT'S ALL THE WAY UNDER THE COUNTER
absurdical: GET IT
THROW IT OUT
me: WASN'T I BRAVE ENOUGH ALREADY
absurdical: JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE
THEN YOU CAN CURL UP ON THE COUCH AND SCREAM FOREVER
me: ejfiaehfpiaep
IT'S NOT THERE ANYMORE
I GIVE UP
I'M MOVING
absurdical: WHAT
AUGH
SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE
me: ....i killed it
absurdical: again?
me: would you believe that i seem to have hurt myself doing so
absurdical: DID YOU DISPOSE THE BODY
me: YES
i hurt my finger somehow
and it is swelling up! lololol
absurdical: hahahaahhaha
me: EVERYTHING IS GREAT
absurdical: GREAT